Faith Without Works

My perception of worldly things in regards to faith is not one I’ve seen openly portrayed in my church communities... 

Let me first start by saying this is just my experience, and it’s meant to be shared with someone who may also be in the space similar to that I’m working out of. This is my way of saying “You're not alone. I get you.” Lastly, if you subscribe to the notion that people of faith need to be a perfect, sinless reflection of Christ to the world, let me just stop you and say THIS AINT THE POST FOR YOU BOO, please exist left :)

Being raised Pentecostal Christian, I was always taught in moments of need, pray. Depressed, pray. Anxious, pray. Fearful, pray. “ Pray and God will take it away”, always said with the best intentions. “Don’t claim worldly things over you.” I will be the person, to be honest, and raise my hand to say prayer has not cured my depression. And not claiming what is actually going on with you emotionally, when you clearly are suffering from some sort of mental illness doesn’t stop you from feeling the effects of said mental illness(es). It just allows you to ignore the problem and not get better. People do not realize the danger in saying these things. Yes, it's said with best intentions but it can also be dismissive and neglectful. As Christians, we are to be aiding people down the path of true healing. Sometimes that means acknowledging the world. I’m going to make some people mad here but … We need to stop telling people that prayer is the end all be all. 

That's not to say prayer doesn’t help. My God is a God of miracles, there is no doubt about that. More times than not when praying, reading my bible, spending time with God, gives me the peace I need.... BUT I would be lying to you if I said I still don’t get depressed. I would be lying if I said I still don’t have anxiety attacks. I would be lying if I said there aren’t nights that I completely don’t sleep out of fear.

 And on nights I don’t sleep I think of the people who suffer in silence because of the perception of perfection. Or people who question the reality of God because they still suffer. We as the church have to start teaching people how to heal instead of how to hide. That may mean questioning how we have previously handled things.

 I attended a sermon a while back where one of my pastors got on stage and talked about her OCD and the steps she took to being cured of what she was going through. Lots of prayer and scripture, yes, but also going to a therapist, and taking medication. She offered the perception of God's ways of not being like our own. And more specifically what if God's way wasn’t to cure you instantly in that prayer, but to equip a Doctor somewhere with a cure? What if God's answer to your prayer(s) was to allow a therapist to open a practice in your town? What if your deliverance is a 4 step plan and you’re only doing 2 of the steps? After all faith without works...

Now I don’t take medication or see a counselor, so I can’t say if it works. Maybe in the future, you’ll get an update from me. As of now, I’m still processing the acknowledgment of the fact that I may need help. The church community I was raised in, as well as within my family specifically, we don’t discuss the “ugly things” that deem us as imperfect Christians. We ignore them, we shame them, we hide them.

To other Christians who may be having a similar experience to me, hopefully, this is opening your eyes to a different perspective or maybe providing some comforting in reading that someone else is going through the same thing. To other Christians that dismiss mental illness in the manners I previously discussed, please understand the danger and harm in what you could be doing for someone. The guilt and shame of not being a “perfect” (not possible) Christian is what causes people to turn from God and instead to things like drugs, alcohol, and sex to cope … Trust me I’ve seen it.