The Arrogant Christian

I think that in some ways, it’s harder to be born a Christian than to become one later in life. Why do I say that? Because I presume that for someone who came into a relationship with Jesus later in life, it’s easier to not go back to whatever lifestyle they were found in.

Let me explain. As someone who was born into a relationship with God, I don’t know a day when He never existed. As I have gotten older and matured, my relationship and understanding of God have too. The one bell that has rung true my entire life is “God is always there for me.”

I have countless examples of stronger moments and weaker moments in life, and God has been a part of all of it. He’s always there—never left, never forsaken, never forgotten me. He always shows up eventually. In a way, I think that makes me (and people raised like me) less afraid to sin.

It dangerously produces a level of arrogance that allows me to take God’s mercy and grace for granted. It allows for the false creation of selfish comfort, such as “I don’t have to pray today, God will be there tomorrow,” or “I can do XYZ and just repent about it… tomorrow.” Somewhere along the way, I gained the false assurance/promise of tomorrow. A gamble I feel more willing to take because I don’t know the pain and suffering of having a life without God in it and have never had to. It’s a very different mindset from turning away from things and refusing to go back because you have the experience that GOD IS BETTER. I’ve never known worse.

Sure, let’s go past that second margarita, I’m only out with family and friends. I’ll just get “tipsy” not drunk.

Yes, I am cussing, getting angry, indulging in rage, but it’s okay because it’s only when I’m driving. Surely it won’t spill over into my other forms of communication and addressing people in day-to-day life.

I did let my anger for that one coworker grow into hatred and gossip, but it’s valid—what she did to me is way worse.

Oh, it’s okay, I don’t have to read my Bible today. We read a lot of scripture Sunday in church.

Teetering on the edge. Justifying small slips until a big fall. And in case anyone was feeling attacked there, in all those examples I was talking about me. Arrogant and entitled. Just like the Israelites. Taking advantage of God and His grace. Testing the limits of His goodness, without even realizing that I’m doing so. That’s why, in some way, I envy the heart of new believers. Because if all you’ve known is a life stranded at sea, drowning, and struggling every day to stay afloat—I can imagine that it would be easier for you to want to avoid the beach altogether, let alone touch the water.